Rajshekar - The reality of dreams unfulfilled - Chapter 12 - The Chronicles of the Youngest Child
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Raj had done exceptionally well in his 10th standard exam at the Military Boarding School in Bangalore. The result had given him the confidence to start thinking seriously about what he would do next. He'd somehow got Amma to give him money to take the train to town and check out the reputed Science colleges of St. Xavier's and Elphinstone. He'd already done some research while still in school about the reputed colleges for the Science stream in Bombay, asking Neel Ammavan to ask his contacts. He knew that Ammavan was someone who knew a lot of people and was well informed and a reliable source. Raj also paid attention to where the boys who originated from around Bombay, particularly those who scored high marks in 10th, generally went after their school days. His conclusion was that these two colleges were the best.
St. Xavier's had a world renowned Blatter Herbarium, providing exceptional botanical reference. Even though Botany was not his calling, it gave him hope of being accepted into such a prestigious institution. He was highly interested in pursuing Engineering, so he was looking forward to learning Physics and the other sciences. Elphinstone was also highly reputed for the sciences. With all the impressions he'd collected about these colleges over the years, Raj made his way to both colleges.
He loved the area of Bombay where both colleges were situated. The large roads, the colonial style architecture and the lines of students he saw waiting to enrol made him very excited. He eventually got his turn to show his marksheet to the person in charge at St. Xavier's and was given to understand that he had a good chance of getting in. But he needed to submit the marksheet and pay a fee to secure his seat as soon as possible. His school in Bangalore had a great reputation too, and so the man seemed keen to have Raj apply immediately. However, Raj knew that even though he'd told his Amma about his plan, he still had to talk to his father. The yearly fees would be nearing Rs.250, and he could get a half price on the railway pass from Borivali to Marine Lines at Rs.7 per month. He would also have to consider the Ticket Book cost of Rs.10 for 100 tickets, as he would need to take the bus to the station, which would cost 10 paise per ride. With all these numbers juggling in his mind, he took the empty train back to Borivali. He had not eaten anything since he'd left that morning. He thought that he would probably buy another lime water when he got off at the station. He was hungry, but he dreaded the conversation about money that he knew he would have with his father, and somehow that killed his need for food. He hoped that, since his Daddy had been very proud of his high score, it would be possible after all to go to college in town. He realised that his shirt was sticking to his body and pulled on it for some relief. It was the yellow shirt with the small lavender flowers. He tried not to think of all the nice clothes he'd seen the other aspiring students wear and reminded himself that an education would be more useful than fancy clothes. Why did these thoughts always come to his mind when he was hungry, he wondered.
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As he walked home from the 206 bus stop, he looked at the buildings that had all come up in the last few years. The road was finally looking like a real road. The dense canopies of the trees had lessened over the years. This place, however, seemed completely the opposite from what he'd just seen on the other side of town. Once home, he realised that Daddy had come home for lunch and had noticed his absence. Amma was looking a bit worried about having kept the secret from Daddy. She, however, now listened to Raj's excited chatter and tried to make sense of what he'd seen and experienced. She was particularly proud that he'd managed the train journey all on his own and returned safely. Then she remembered guiltily that this child had lived thousands of kilometres away from her for years, and he probably was much more capable than she was giving him credit for. She smiled at her thoughts and continued to listen to him. Ammini remembered those colonial looking colleges that Raj was describing from when they lived in Colaba at the Military grounds, exactly where he had been born. She suddenly felt sad that they lived so far away from where her son would like to study. She had also forgotten for a moment that her husband was now ex-military and worked for the St. Françis Technical Institute, which was conveniently 15 minutes away. His new job was all so convenient for them as a family.
That evening, Raj told Ramchandra about his visit to St. Xavier's and Elphinstone. Daddy listened quietly, understanding how much this meant to his son. He could feel how much Raj wanted to go to St. Xavier's. But when he thought of the fact that it would cost them around Rs.350 as a family for just the transport and fees for the year, his practical and pragmatic side just could not make sense of those numbers. His son was extremely intelligent and Ramchandra had no doubt that Raj would achieve big things in life. Yet, based on his own life experience, he knew that it was critical for Raj to find a job as quickly as he could. Once he had a job in hand, Raj would be able to move ahead in any direction that he chose, or so Ramchandra told himself. More importantly, any of the courses in the technical college where he was working would cost them a maximum of Rs.180 a year. Ramchandra would also surely be able to get a hefty concession as he'd worked for the Institute for some years now. And the Institute had subsidised fees for both children of employees and students from low income families. There would be no transport costs as the school was a short walk away from home.
They weren't starving as a family and they had their own flat, but Ramchandra knew that they still had to be careful. He'd had to be careful since he was 14, reflected Ramchandra, and sighed. This would be a very big blow to his first born, he knew, and he was also worried about how his wife would react, but he also knew that he was going to have to tell Raj that, yet again, he wasn't going to get what he wanted. But who got anything they wanted anyway? Ramchandra himself only knew how to provide for other people's needs. He swallowed hard and softly said, "But my dear son..."
You can hear me read this story on my podcast on Spotify on the channel 'Lekha writes, then reads - Foundation' or by directly clicking on this link https://open.spotify.com/episode/2imHAQ8G8oXgKTUNcgZqB0?si=kbQv4Mt8Q2enPUZ_cT2DMw
You can read all previous chapters from Rajshekar's stories here. Raj was my oldest brother who passed in 2019. These stories are my attempt to honour him and stay connected with his memories.and
Rajshekar - Back Home in Bombay - chapter 10 - The Chronicles of the Youngest Child
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